Zombies in Real Life

 

We all know that people can become zombies. Just look at people as they take the subway mindlessly staring at their phones or scrolling up and down through Facebook. Most of us are already zombies in our real lives, we don’t need an infecteous pathagon.

That aside, nature also produces a wonderful array of zombie-like insects and parasites. Let’s talk about them

Often times, a zombie is the result of a parasitic infection between an individual bitten by a “zombifying” source. The victim is rendered senseless and no more will of its own and is under control of the one who bit it. The “zombified” victim might rely on its source for nourishment or allowed to forage for food. What is certain is that the zombie obeys the wants of its source, like a servant to his master.

While all that seems pure human imagination, one might be surprised to know the zombie parasite relationship is existing in nature and much observed in the Animal Kingdom. For years, scientists have studied and observed thousands of animals and discovered several undeniably zombie parasites. These animals victimize others and turn them into unwilling but subservient hosts.

Fortunately for us, almost all these zombie parasites are very small, sometimes even microscopic. The following are some of the well-documented and extensively-watched zombie parasites:

Wasps

Unlike normal wasps that get pollen from flowers to make honey and sting if threatened, there are species of wasps that are zombie parasites. A good example is the Glypatapanteles species. This type of wasp preys on a caterpillar, laying eggs inside it. The eggs hatch into larvae, who promptly gobble on the caterpillar’s body. What amazes scientists is as the wasp larvae mature and form cocoons, the caterpillar stops eating and focuses towards guarding the cocoons, warding off predators.

Hairworms

So small yet so amazing, that’s how you describe this worm that zombifies crickets. Crickets eat mosquitoes, to which hairworm larvae hatch inside the cricket’s body and proceed to nourish the insides. As it matures, the hairworm infects the cricket’s brain and orders it to look for water, which is ill-advised as the cricket is not a good swimmer! The cricket drowns, the hairworm swim out of its victim and the cycle continues.

Toxoplasma gondii

Smaller than the naked eye yet quite terrifying, T. gondii infect mostly rodents but have been shown to infect humans. Studies show it is able to influence the brains of rats, rendering them unable to distinguish the smell of cat urine, also slowing down their reflexes. Rats infected with T. gondii are easily preyed upon by cats. And there are reports that people infected by T. gondii have slower reflexes, making them accident-prone.   

These three mentioned are but a small sample of the other zombie parasites existing in our world, some with equally if not more terrifying zombie abilities. Aren’t we glad they don’t primarily choose humans as their hosts?

 

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What Happens When Zombies Bite You

Well the short answer to this question is – you turn into a fuckin zombie!

However, I’m sure you already knew that. So let’s get into a little bit of the biology behind what might happen. Notice that I said might. This is all hypothetical.

A zombie is always hungry and its favorite food is usually human flesh. Although when in large numbers zombies would devour humans almost totally, leaving only skulls and a couple of bones, a solitary zombie might attack a human only in order to eat a couple pounds of flesh. 

Whether or not zombies do exist, one cannot simply discard or set aside the concept of a zombie bite and its after-effects. There is actually a lot of science and logic in such idea of an organism propagating and multiplying by attacking others and eventually, transforming them just like it. Despite many movies and written work about zombies, biological science does have a way of explaining how zombification comes to be.

AKA – there is some science to this.

One good scientific explanation for zombies coming to be is fungal infection. I’m not talking about those fungal infections you get on your toes either.  In the case of a zombie parasite, it isn’t a far-fetched idea that fungi spores can be transmitted to another organism through a bite, hence zombie attacks.

The injected spores inside the bitten victim burrow deep and slowly devour its host from the inside. Again this is not fiction as many types of insects and worms have demonstrated the ability to do this, injecting larvae into bitten prey then hatch from inside. As the spores devour the victim, parts of it decay and deteriorate. The original bite mark becomes infected, gangrene sets in. Hence, you have the falling-off look that most zombies have.

As its body continues to decline, the victim requires more nourishment. By then, the spores originally injected from the zombie bite have matured. As mentioned earlier, fungal spores now go after the neural network and induce chemical signals into the brain. Human thought process is rendered inutile, leaving only the five senses. The zombifying spores do leave out motor functions of the nerves and brain, resulting in a mindless organism able to move about and go through obstacles like climbing trees and walls.

As the spores take control totally of the host, they take root in the digestive tract and lie semi-dormant. Part of the digestive system are the mouth and teeth, where spores stand ready to be transmitted. As the victim hunts and preys on other humans, attracted by the distinct smell dictated by the fungi, a bite allows the spores to transfer to another host. This is how the zombie contagion spreads out, which is nothing more than a natural means of fungal reproduction.  

So as far fetched as the idea of a zombie apocalypse may seem, there are some basic scientific principles at work here that make sense.  Let me know what you think about fungi/spores/zombies and anything else you want below.

 

 

   

 

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Zombie Apocalypse Survival Clothing That Makes You Look Like a Badass

Alright first off, yes that’s me looking like a total badass with a bunch of sweet zombie killing gear. Once you have recovered from the shock of how good looking and equipped for survival I am we can continue on with this post.  You can’t just wear any old shit to survive. You’re going to need high quality gear that is at least military grade.

Here are just a couple of things that will get your ready:

The Best Apocalypse Survival Clothes

When the dead rise from their graves, it’s survival of the (out)fittest. When you’re butchering zombies, you want to be protected and safe from getting infected. The best kind of survival clothes are those that can protect you like an armor and still make you look awesome like something straight out of a movie. Your zombie apocalypse survival clothes should also be highly functional and durable. In a zombie outbreak, sometimes the only thing that can save you from getting infected are your clothes. They’re the only ones between you and the flesh-eating undead so it’s better to invest in them.

A Great Pair of Steel Toe High Boots

In the event of a zombie attack, it is best to have a pair of high quality boots and a steel toe pair is almost like a requirement. A steel safety toe ensures that no matter what you hit with your boots while you’re running or rummaging around, it won’t hurt you. It is best to protect your feet because it is the one with the most contact with the ground and there are many sharp objects and small obstacles like stone that could potentially stub your toe or worse, wound your foot. You need to be able to run during an apocalypse so you better take care of your feet.

Protect Your Hands with Gloves

We use our hands in just about anything. It is also very vulnerable to getting bitten or infected because blood can easily enter through the cuticles and open wounds. That’s a why a protective glove is a must. Some gloves in the market come with hard shell plates that protects the back of your hide. These hard shell plates will also come in useful when you have to punch the undead in the face. If you got the money for it, get the Kevlar-reinforced gloves for that added extra layer of impenetrable protection.

The Classic Leather Jacket

It’s like hitting two birds with one stone because not only will it protect you from the elements, it will also keep those zombie mouths away from your flesh. They will have a hard time gnawing and rasping through real leather. A leather jacket is also one of the most fashionable pieces of clothing so it will go well with anything. Add a layer of Kevlar and you also got yourself protected from stray bullets or in case one of the zombies decided a gun would be fun to play with.

Good Old Cargo Pants

There’s a specific one made by Drifire with flame-resistant treatment, knee pads and antibacterial odor control. It’s the perfect cargo pants for survival. In a zombie apocalypse, it is likely that the world has turned into chaos so it’s always better to make sure your pants won’t burn down in case you have to run through fire for your life. Knee pads can resist impact and the antibacterial feature is perfect for the long term. I mean, who got time for laundry when the world is falling apart and infested by flesh-eating zombies? Another great thing about cargo pants are the huge, convenient pockets. The more you can carry in your person, the better.

Got anything else? Maybe a necklace of zombie bones that you wear around your neck?

Drop me a comment and let me know.

 

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Perserved Foods That Don’t Taste Like Dried Donkey Ass

First off let me say that I by no means look down on eating dried donkey ass. As a matter a fact I am very cultured and am open to eating and trying foods from any culture.  But if you don’t have a zombie apocalypse survival kit or zombie weapons then preserved foods are vital for surviving the first 72 hours.

There are many ways to preserve food and the best methods also depends on the type of food. If you’re prepping for survival, it is best to know about food preservation and the causes of food deterioration. The main causes are the microbes and enzymes. In the event of a zombie apocalypse, you won’t know until when the outbreak will last so you have to stock up on foods that will last long. A technique on how to easily and steadily build a zombie survival food stash is to always get an extra or a couple more. Get a couple more of anything you buy in the grocery each time you go and store those extra two in the pantry or in a separate cupboard. Always keep in mind what lasts longer and don’t buy any extra perishables. Eventually, your stash will grow and you will be ready in case of a zombie outbreak.

Dried Foods

Dried fruits, vegetables, beans, rice, and other dried grains should be on your priority list when it comes to your survival stash. Drying or dehydrating foods is excellent because not only will it make the food last longer, it will also remove water which is responsible for most of the food’s weight especially in fruits and vegetables. When moisture is eliminated, the enzymes and microbes cannot thrive thus the food won’t spoil easily. It is also one of the easiest and cheapest ways to store food in the long term.

Canned Goods

Before the foods are placed in cans, they undergo complete sterilization first which gets rid of all the microbes. The enzymes are also destroyed because of the high temperatures they go through in the canning process. Properly canned goods are placed in air-tight cans and other containers such as jars and sealed completely. Canned goods last for up to two years so it is best to consume these within that time period. They can be anything from fruits, vegetables, meat, and beans. Canned goods should be abundant on your zombie survival shelf because they’re very cheap, easily found in grocery stores, and convenient to eat because most canned foods can be eaten straight out of the can. You may use plastic containers if you plan to do it yourself because if you ever have to leave your house, it is heavy to bring them wherever you might go.

Frozen Foods

Freezing is easy to do and it retains most of the nutritional value of the food. The only problem is when the electricity goes off and you don’t have a generator. Still, if you run out of fuel, the frozen foods will eventually thaw and they will become susceptible to microbes. Frozen foods are the ones you consume first and you must keep in mind that freezing shouldn’t be your primary choice in food preservation. Meat, poultry products, and food containing dairy are the ones that easily spoil. But if you have a generator, then go ahead because frozen foods are healthier and provide you with more nutrients than many dried or canned goods.

That’s it. I’m sure there are about 500 other foods that would be helpful and if you know them, great, drop a comment below and let me know what foods you keep your pantry stocked up with.

 

 

 

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Top 10 Zombie Types in Movies and TV

This week’s post is brought to you from my good friend – Youtube. While we might have all have our own ideas of how zombies move, dance and party they are all based on… well, not much.  If we were Chinese we’d probably think zombies hop around like rabbits (this is actually true) and if we were German then we might think zombies take the subway. Alright enough of my shitty introduction, just watch the damn video about 10 types of zombies. I have nothing else to say this week.

Drop a comment below and let me know you think a zombie would dance. Describe in one adjective or less.

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Gerber Bear Grylls Paracord Fixed Blade Knife

Full Tang stainless steel construction. Handle wrapped with 60 inches of customizable paracord. The Paracord fixed blade comes with a handy carrying case. Available in everyone’s favorite color – 1970’s neon.

Gerber Bear Grylls Paracord Fixed Blade Knife

Full Tang stainless steel construction. Handle wrapped with 60 inches of customizable paracord. The Paracord fixed blade comes with a handy carrying case. Available in everyone’s favorite color – 1970’s neon.

Buy Now

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Gerber Remix Tactical Knife

If you want something small the Gerber Remix Tactical is exactly what you want.  Small enough to fit into a survival kit, it’s a great backup knife for any tight situation.

Gerber Remix Tactical Knife

If you want something small the Gerber Remix Tactical is exactly what you want. Small enough to fit into a survival kit, it’s a great backup knife for any tight situation.

Buy Now

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